Monday, 31 August 2015

Until now....

Hello and welcome to my blog.  

I am 47, I have been overweight and unfit for most of my adult life.

How did I let that happen?

Who knows, I can blame circumstance - I've been a single parent of 3 children (young adults now) for 14 years.  I have in that time, become a little bit within myself for numerous reasons, my marriage broke down, I didn't want to meet anyone else while the children were little, I didn't have much money.  It was easier to come home from work, shut the door and make sure the kids were brought up happy and safely. My Parents and Brother are local and help when they can, but it was essentially me and the children.  

I had a Immune Defiency disorder for about 6 years, which resulted in painful sores all over my legs, a bout of Chemotherapy and only ended with two lots of skin grafts so most days it was enough to look after the children and go to work, never mind even contemplating exercise.

But I don't think circumstance is 100% to blame of course.  My mental battle is where I think my problem always was.  I have found it difficult to turn off that voice 'Jasper' (I decided to name the voice in my head .. I know crazy right?), the voice that tells you it's ok to give into what you want rather than what you know to be better for you.

I'm not a psychologist  but I know/have known I have a problem with my relationship with food and being active.  I'm not completely lazy I work full-time, I run a house on my own with little uns then three teenagers and now three young adults.

My battle has always been between knowing what I need to do and committing to that and then giving in to that voice in my head that says 'go on, one more day' well unfortunately 30 years of 'one more day' has led me to this point.

I gave up smoking 25 years or so ago and have only drank alcohol once in 13 years. Both decisions that I made myself, just switched off the 'like' button and over night stopped... why can't I do that with unhealthy food.

I'm seriously overweight and worry about my health.  Aside from the physiological issues about being overweight there are psychological issues too. My life has pretty much been on hold socially for 15 years.  I rarely go out and the only thing that's on my mind is what is everyone thinking when they look at me or what if I see someone I knew years ago, so it's hard to fully relax and let go.

I have been given the amazing opportunity to change, right now.  I need a complete reprogramme I struggle trying to plan healthy meal plans and follow through with the exercise plans I set out.

My friend Emily at work knew of a local Personal Trainer who was offering a 'Give Back Programme' so she sent in an email about me, she knows how I feel about my weight, so it was a lovely thing for her to do.  

The Personal Trainer was looking for someone he can help to change the life of by giving them support and guidance, teaching them how to plan and manage their time so that they can start to change their life.

It was perfect for me and just what I felt I needed so I decided to apply myself.  I had to send an email over telling Chris about me, my life and how I'd got into the situation I was in.  I got through to the final ten applicants.  I met up with Chris for an 'interview' and we had a chat for about 30 minutes.  He explained what would be happen and how committed I'd need to be. After our chat I left and waited to hear.

About two weeks later I got the most amazing news... I'd won!!

I was the person that Chris of Kelly's Coaching had chosen to give this incredible gift to.   Six months of free Personal Training.  Just what I need, the chance to change my life. What an amazing gift to give someone.  I cannot thank him enough for that gift.

I have to prove to him and myself that he made the right decision.  There were others who were no doubt as worthy of his help, I have to do this for them too and mostly I have to do this for mine and my children's lives so I can be a positive role model for them when it comes to health, fitness and well-being.

I'd love it if you'd follow my journey.  If I can lose weight and exercise after thirty years of being mostly sedentary where exercise is concerned and not entirely but mostly eating a poor diet then anyone can, especially with the amount I have to lose (will go into that when we get started).  I have absolutely no doubt that there will be times when I'm not feeling so positive about it, when I don't want to exercise, when I would rather be eating something else but I will have to push through those times and if I can then I've no doubt I'll succeed with Chris' guidance and advice (and a dose of no BS say it as it is when I need it).

My journey will begin around the middle of September, I'd love it if you could join me and see if I can shut Jasper and his 'one more day' up for good (or at least be strong enough to tell him to bugger off) and get my life back.